Templong Anituhan

Reflections on Leadership, Criticism, Trust, and the Deep Work of Renewal

Yesterday marked an important transition in my spiritual journey.

After formally bidding farewell to Diwatang Makaako of the Kinaray-a people, I stood before the Kapulungan ng mga Diwata and asked for a new guardian and guide for Templong Anituhan Inc. For the coming lunar cycle, from August 13 to September 11, 2026, Bathala of the Katagalugan stepped forward to serve as guardian and spiritual guide.

At first, I imagined this new cycle would begin peacefully.

Instead, it began with a trial.

That very evening, a message appeared in one of our Hilot Binabaylan group chats. Questions were raised regarding decisions made by the Hilot Binabaylan Council concerning individuals who had been marked as “Under Review,” “Not in Good Standing,” or “Cultural Appropriator” on an official platform.

The discussion quickly became emotional.

The disciplinary decisions of the Council were questioned. Motives were challenged. The actions taken to uphold previously agreed standards and written commitments were interpreted by some as public shaming, cyberbullying, or personal attacks.

As the discussion intensified, accusations followed.

One statement struck particularly deep:

“For someone who claims who doesn’t speak English well, you are really good at gas lighting. I know my truth.”

To be accused of hurting others when one is trying to protect an institution can be painful.

To be accused of manipulation when one believes he is defending principles can wound the heart.

And so, the following morning, I cried.

I cried before Bathala.

I cried before the Great Power that created me.

For several months, from May until August, there had been very little income entering my life. Yet expenses continued. I wondered whether I should simply let things run their course. I questioned whether I should continue traveling abroad to teach. I questioned whether the sacrifices were worth the criticism.

For a moment, weariness entered my spirit.

But only for a moment.

The Whisper of Bathala

Later that day, after lunch, I felt something within me shift.

A quiet realization emerged.

A new moon always calls for a new beginning.

Yet before something new can be planted, the soil must first be prepared.

Bathala seemed to whisper:

“Before a new plan can emerge, what is hidden must first be revealed.”

This changed my entire perspective.

The painful events of the morning were no longer merely conflict.

They became revelation.

Not punishment.

Not condemnation.

Revelation.

Spiritual cleansing is rarely comfortable.

People often imagine blessings arrive as ease, comfort, and validation.

But sometimes a blessing arrives by exposing what has been concealed.

An unhealthy attachment.

An unresolved wound.

A relationship that no longer serves our path.

A hidden resentment.

A pattern of dependency.

Or even people whose intentions were never as aligned as we believed.

Bathala’s first act was not to bring comfort.

His first act was to bring clarity.

The Difference Between Guilt and Cleansing

One of the questions many spiritual leaders face is this:

“If conflict appears, does that mean I am wrong?”

The answer is not necessarily.

The appearance of conflict is not always evidence of guilt.

Sometimes conflict is evidence that truth is surfacing.

Cleansing is not the same as condemnation.

A river becomes muddy when the bottom is stirred.

The mud was always there.

The stirring simply makes it visible.

The same thing happens in human life.

When a new spiritual season begins, dormant issues sometimes rise to the surface. They are not appearing because the person suddenly became impure.

They are appearing because healing has begun.

This is an important distinction.

A spiritual cleansing is not an announcement of failure.

It is an invitation toward greater freedom.

Following One’s Own Sacred Guidance

Another lesson that emerged concerned spiritual authority.

In recent years, there have been moments when others insisted that I should not work with certain people because their spirits, guides, or personal revelations advised against it.

Yet my own spiritual experiences, my ancestors, and the Diwata guiding my path communicated something different.

This raises an important question:

Whose spiritual guidance should we follow?

Respecting another person’s spiritual experiences is important.

But surrendering one’s own discernment is something else entirely.

Every spiritual practitioner must ultimately walk in accordance with the guidance they genuinely receive through their own relationship with the Sacred.

If we abandon our deepest convictions every time another person disagrees, we risk losing our spiritual sovereignty.

Listening to others is wisdom.

Surrendering our conscience to others is bondage.

Peace Amid Uncertainty

The most remarkable realization from this entire experience is that despite the challenges, I do not feel afraid.

I am aware of financial needs.

I am aware of responsibilities.

I am aware that my teaching journey to Hawaii approaches on September 8.

Yet fear is absent.

There is sadness.

There is disappointment.

There is even occasional frustration.

But there is no fear.

This peace did not originate from certainty.

It originated from trust.

Trust that provision will arrive.

Trust that students will come when the time is right.

Trust that patients who need healing will find their way.

Trust that what has served its purpose will depart, and what is meant to remain will remain.

The Sacred Work of Deep Cleansing

Perhaps the greatest lesson of this first day under Bathala’s guardianship is that spiritual cleansing is not always gentle.

Sometimes it exposes.

Sometimes it separates.

Sometimes it reveals loyalties.

Sometimes it removes illusions.

And sometimes it asks us to stand firmly in our truth even when misunderstood.

Deep cleansing does not merely wash away dirt.

It uncovers what has been hidden beneath the surface.

I believe this is what Bathala is doing now.

Not destroying.

Refining.

Not shaming.

Purifying.

Not abandoning.

Preparing.

This is only the first day.

There are many more days to come in this lunar cycle.

I do not yet know exactly what Bathala intends to build during this season.

I do not yet know what new plans will emerge.

But I trust the process.

And for that trust, I give thanks.

I give thanks to my Ancestors.

I give thanks to the Diwata.

I give thanks to the Great Power that created all things.

And I give thanks to Bathala, whose first gift was not comfort, but clarity.

For sometimes clarity is the greatest blessing of all.

May we all have the courage to allow what is hidden to be revealed, what is wounded to be healed, and what is no longer needed to be released.

Apu Adman Aghama
Hilot Academy of Binabaylan
Templong Anituhan Inc.